To   his   worthie   good   patron,   Lu- stie Humfrey, according as the towns- men  doo  christen  him,  little   Numps,  as   the Nobilitie   and    Courtiers    do   name  him,  and  Honest Humfrey, as  all  his  friendes  and   acquaintance  esteeme him,   King   of   the   Tobacconists   hic  &  ubique,  and  a   singu- lar Mecaenas to to Pipe and the Tabour (as his patient liuery attendant can witnesse) his bounden Orator T.N. most prostrately offers vp this tribute of inke and paper.

Most courteous vnlearned louer of Poetry, and yet a Poet thy selfe, of no lesse price then H. S., that in honour of Maid-marrian giues sweete Margerã for his Empresse, and puttes the Sowe most sawcily vppon some great personage, what euer she bee, bidding her (as it runnes in the old song) Go from my Garden go, for there no flowers for thee doth grow, These be to notifie to your diminutiue excelsitude, and compendiate greatnesse, what my zeale is towardes you, that in no streighter bonds woulde bee pounded and enlisted, then in an Epistle Dedicatorie. Too many more lusty-bloud Brauamente segniors, with Cales beards as broade as scullers maples that they make / cleane their boates with, could I haue turned it ouer, and had nothing for my labour, some faire woords except of  Good sir, will it please you to come neere and drinke a cuppe of wine? after my returne from Ireland I doubt not but my fortunes will be of some growth to requite you. In the meane time my sword is at your commaund ; and, before God, money so scatteringly runnes heere and there vppon vtensilia, furnitures, ancients, and other necessary preparations, (and which is a double charge, looke how much Tobacco wee carry with vs to expell cold, the like quantitie of Staues-aker wee must prouide vs of to kill lice in that rugged countrey of rebels,) that I say vnto you, in the word of a martialist, wee cannot doo as wee would.     I am no incredulous Didimus, but haue more fayth to beleeue they haue no coyne, then they haue meanes to supplie themselues with it ; and so leaue them. To any other carpetmunger or primerose knight of Primero bring I a dedication, and the dice ouer night haue not befriended him, hee sleepes fiue dayes and fiue nights to new skin his beautie, and will not bee knowne hee is awakt till his men vppon their owne bondes (a dismall world for trenchermen, when theyr maisters bond shal not be so good as theirs) haue took vp commodities or fresh droppings of the minte for him: and then ; what then? he payes for the ten dozen of balles hee left vppon the score at the tennis court ; hee sendes for his Barber to depure, decurtate, and spunge him, whome hauing not paide a twelmonth before, he now raines downe eight quarter angels into his hande, to make his liberalitie seeme greater, and giues him a cast riding ierkin and an olde Spanish hatte into the bargaine, and Gods peace bee with him.  The chamber is not ridde of the smell of his feet, but the greasie shoomaker with his squirrels skin and a whole stall of ware vppon his arme enters, and wrencheth his legges for an houre togither, and after shewes his tally. By S. Loy, that drawes deepe, and by that time his Tobacco marchant is made euen with, and hee hath dinde at a tauerne, and slept his vnder-meale at a bawdy house, his purse is on the heild and only fortie shillings hee hath behinde, to trie his fortune with at the cardes in the presence ; which if it prosper, / the court cannot containe him, but to London againe he will, to reuell it, and haue two playes in one night, inuite all the Poets and Musitions to his chamber the next morning ; where, against theyr comming, a whole heape of money shall bee bespread vppon the board, and all his trunkes opened to shewe his riche sutes ; but the deuill a whit hee bestowes on them saue bottle ale and Tobacco: and desires a generall meeting.   The particular of it is that bounty is bankerupt, and Lady sensualitie licks all the fat fro the seuen Liberal Sciences, that Poetry, if it were not a trick to please my Lady, would bee excluded out of Christian buriall, and in steade of wreathes of lawrell to crowne it with, haue a bell with a cocks combe clapt on the crowne of it by olde Iohannes de Indagines and his quire of dorbellists. Wherefore the premisses considered (I pray you consider of that woord Premisses, for somewhere I haue borrowed it) neither to rich, noble, right worshipfull, or worshipfull, of spirituall or temporall, will I consecrate this woorke, but to thee and thy capering humour alone, that, if thy starres had doone thee right, they should haue made thee one of the mightiest princes of Germany ; not for thou canst driue a coach or kill an oxe so wel as they, but that thou art neuer wel but when thou art amongst the retinue of the Muses, and there spendest more in the twinckling of an eye, then in a whole yeare thou gettest by some grasierly gentilitie thou followest. A King thou art by name, and a King of good fellowshippe by nature, whereby I ominate this Encomion of the king of fishes was predestinate to thee from thy swadling clothes. Hugge it, ingle it, kisse it, and cull it, now thou hast it, & renounce eating of greene beefe and garlike till Martlemas, if it be not the next stile to The strife of Loue in a Dreame, or the Lamentable burning of Teuerton. Giue mee good words I beseech thee, though thou giuest me nothing else, and thy words shal stand for thy deeds ; which I will take as well in woorth, as if they were the deedes and euidences of all the lande thou hast. Heere I bring you a redde herring ; if you will finde drinke to it, there an ende, no other detriments will I putte you to. Let the Kanne of strong ale, your / constable, with the toaste, his browne bill, and sugar and nutmegs, his watchmen, stand in a readinesse, to entertaine mee euerie time I come by your lodging. In Ruscia, there are no presents but of meate or drinke ; I present you with meate,and you, in honourable courtesie to requite mee, can do no lesse then present mee with the best mornings draught of merry-go-downe in your quarters: and so I kisse the shadow of your feetes shadow, amiable Donsell, expecting your sacred Poeme of the Hermites Tale that will restore the golden age amonst vs, and vppon my soules knees I take my leaue.

Yours for a whole laste of redde Herrings. Th. Nashe